September 10, 2012


Posted in family, Kat, personal, poetry at 8:30 pm by jimazing


Becoming harder each day to push back the inevitable pressures of life; the pressures common to us all. This awful disease unsatisfied with being compartmentalized. Breaking all barriers, demanding its own

and everything else.

A cancer of attention, a cancer of emotion taking every spare breath, every free moment.

Cancer itself annoyed at the prospect that attention might be paid to a friend, a car repair, a moment of peace with a loved one, a longing for normalcy. Vacuuming up all emotional energy. No patience. No margin.

Like physical cancer that disguises itself as a normal cell and grows with a vengeance, this parallel “cancer” takes normalcy and turns it inside out. Nothing else matters!

Surprised… a moment of calm. A butterfly visits the lantana. I planted that lantana next to the vegetables; the basil that made so much yummy pesto, the tomatoes that need no explanation. Butterfly dips its straw in and sucks on its lantana smoothy. The crickets chirp. Clarity, sanity… for a moment.

The moment snatched by…



  1. UB said,

    My goodness, NB that was one of your best. I deeply regret what brought you to penning these words, but also know that the greatest glory often comes from the greatest suffering. In those few words you gave all those who care a window into you soul. Thank you for allowing me to walk with you. The good news??? Even cancer will be swallowed up in victory. It doesn’t get to have the last word. I love you.

  2. John said,

    Sometimes the most amazing expressions of the heart are from inexplicable or indecipherable experiences of pain, grief, fear, confusion and disappointment mixed with a longing for hope, peace and relief. Jim, your poem is a wonderful, beautiful, fearful, hopeful, and mystical. Thank you for sharing you journey, your struggle, your life. I am with you in the battle and when the battle subsides. You are fighting the good fight. We are fighting together.

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